GeekSugar

Website of the Day: Things to Be Happy About

GeekSugar — Mon, 13 Oct 2008 10:01:00 PDT

A website like this couldn't have come at a better time. Now that you've taken a look at some sites that will help save you money, it's time to have a bit of fun and remember that at the end of the day - there's always something that can put a big smile on your face. Things to Be Happy About is a bright, cheery site that will help you make a list of all the things that make you happy with the Happy Creator. So maybe it is just a list generator, but you can check out the main page to see all the lists others have created (trust me, they make you feel warm and fuzzy inside), and you can always go back and read your happy lists or share them with friends and family! This neat site was created after the book 14,000 Things to Be Happy About by Barbara Ann Kipfer.

To learn how to post your favorite websites to our Website of the Day group,

I know that this long list looks scary, but trust me, once you get the hang of it, it'll be a snap the second time around.

First of all, join the Website of the Day group.
Click the pink "Share" menu on the top left side of the page.
Choose "Blog" and “Regular Post.”
Give your story a “Title.”
Fill in the “Body” with a link to your favorite website and the reasons why you love it.
Click “Next."
Choose the audience for your story to “Website of the Day” in the drop-down menu
Add keyword(s) (for example mine for this photo was "Website of the Day").
Change channel to “Technology and Gadgets.”
Fill in tag field with relevant tags.
Click “I’m done” to submit content.

So join the Website of the Day group and share information about all your favorite sites! Yours just might end up on the geeksugar homepage!

Hysteria Director Tanya Wexler Talks Vibrators, Faking It, and Duck Sex

Tara Block — Fri, 25 May 2012 04:00:15 PDT

Don't be shy . . . It's time to talk sex toys! And Hysteria director Tanya Wexler is writing us a prescription for pleasure. Tanya's film - what she calls "the vibrator movie you can bring your mom to" - is in limited release and stars Hugh Dancy, Maggie Gyllenhaal, and Rupert Everett. When working on a romantic comedy that centers around the invention of the vibrator, you end up with some entertaining and embarrassing situations along the way, and lucky for us, Tanya spilled all the hilariously dirty details. From teaming up with the film's partner Jimmyjane for a drive-by vibrator drop-off to a certain female Oscar-winner to trying unsuccessfully to get ducks to shag on command, Tanya was bursting with great stories from working on this very unconventional film. And while Tanya isn't ashamed to discuss the sexy subject matter of her latest film with us, the mother of four and her partner of 21 years did have a tricky challenge telling her preteen kids what her movie was about. (She eventually gave them the script and let them figure it out themselves!) Check out our interview with the fun-loving director now, and we dare you not to have a girl crush on her by the end!

TrèsSugar: What were some of the challenges to getting a movie made about vibrators?
Tanya Wexler: Getting the script right was tricky because if you just make a movie about the invention of the vibrator, it's actually a really short movie: you go "bzz" and it's done. And we had a kind of light romantic comedy. I say I made the vibrator movie you can bring your mom to. But some people wanted it to be raunchy or some people wanted it to be more serious and about feminism. People project a lot onto this movie of what they want, because there isn't a lot out there about vibrators and women's pleasure, and we still don't really deal with that topic very well, or we're overly antsy around it. And as a result, people have a lot of ideas of what the movie could and should be, and you can't please everyone. [laughs]

TS: Ha, good one.
TW: It's nonstop!

TS: Do you find sex toys inherently funny or something to be seriously celebrated?
TW: Yes!

TS: Both?
TW: Yes! Yes. I think they make me laugh, and I think that the inner kind of Beavis and Butt-head in all of us goes "[laugh]." You know, that inner 13-year-old, like, "Hahaha vibrator . . . " and yet they're awesome and fun.

TS: What shocked you the most when researching the movie?
TW: That ducks are the rapists of the bird world, and you'll see when you see the movie, because there's a little bit of questionable duck behavior - or awesome duck behavior - in the movie. It's totally a sidebar, but you cannot make ducks shag on command. I'm just saying.

TS: What about the whole history of hysteria being a medical condition?
TW: When I first heard the idea, I was like, "What do you mean it was invented in Victorian times?" I knew about hysteria, but the idea that the treatment was manual [British accent] massage deparaxism - which is what they called it - and, of course, the denial. The most shocking thing is the denial, that they didn't think it was sexual.

TS: Do you think they were really in denial?
TW: No, I don't think that some people were. My college roommate was with her high school boyfriend for two years and she had never had an orgasm. I think there's all kinds of denial, especially with women's sexuality. So the fact that there are young women today who haven't had an orgasm, whether self-induced - which is insane - or with a partner, then why wouldn't we think back then that women wouldn't know what orgasms were?

They would get a massage, and the doctor's saying, "Without a penis, this isn't sex, because sex is about procreation," so what is this? The best physical therapy you've ever had. So once you don't think of it as something other than what the doctor's supposed to do to cure your uncontrollable crying or uncontrollable laughter or whatever, then it's just an awesome muscle spasm. If you don't think women have their own inherent sexuality, then you're not thinking about it like that.

Keep reading for Tanya's thoughts on Fifty Shades and more!

8 Myths About Sex Differences

The Good Men Project — Fri, 25 May 2012 02:00:49 PDT

We're happy to present this story from one of our favorite sites, The Good Men Project. Today, Agustín Fuentes points out that when it comes to men and women, what "everyone knows" isn’t what science shows.

Everyone knows that men and women are really different. We think differently and act differently because we are wired differently. I mean look at our brains and genitals: they are just plain different. Right?

Wrong.

What if many of the things we assume about the biology of difference are not so different at all? What if it is not our “wiring” but the ways in which our bodies and minds develop and play out in society that makes us seem so unalike? Could it be that men and women are more similar than we think?

I Dumped the Love of My Life and Now She Doesn’t Trust Me

Yes, women give birth and lactate and men do not. And yes, men are, on average, slightly larger than women and usually have greater upper body strength. There are these basic biological differences between the sexes and they are important . . . but why always focus on the differences and not the biological, and behavioral, similarities? Ahh, that would be because of gender.

Gender is a powerful reality; it is the perception and expectation of differences between males and females and it shapes both our bodies and our society. Gender differences are real and important, but they are not hard wired or even static. There is no biological or evolutionary mandate that only women really care for babies and show emotions, or that males are the best at economics and politics and prefer beers and skirt-chasing to domestic bliss. These are patterns of gender roles and expectations that shape the ways we look at our biology and behavior. They influence the way we expect the world to be. It is the strength of the societal myths about sex that fool us into thinking that men and women are so different by nature.

So let’s bust some of those myths.

Gender and sex are the same thing.

Sex and gender are interconnected, but not the same thing. Sex is a biological state that is measured via what chromosomes you have (XX or XY, usually) and aspects of your body and physiology. Gender includes the roles, expectations and perceptions that a given society has for the sexes. Most societies have two genders on a masculinity-femininity continuum. Some have more. We are born with a biological sex, but acquire gender. There is a ton of individual diversity within societies and sexes in regards to how sex and gender play out in behavior and personality.

There is an extensive body of data demonstrating this, but people interested only in specific differences between men and women choose to ignore it.

Male and female genitals are totally different.

Most people think that male and female genitals are about as different as can be: penis=male and vagina=female. But even this basic dichotomy is not quite correct: the genitals emerge from the same mass of embryonic tissue. For the first six weeks of life the tissue masses develop identically. At about 6-7 weeks, depending on whether the fetus has XX or XY chromosomes (usually), the tissues to start to differentiate. One part of the tissues begins to form the clitoris or penis and another forms the labia or scrotum. Another area begins to form into either the testes or the ovaries. This means that physiologically, male and female genitals are made of the same stuff and work in similar ways.

Male and female brains are different.

If there were really deep seated differences between male and female human behavior and biology they should show up in the brain. The genitals start in the same place and end up looking different, the brain does not. Our brains are pretty much the same. Male brains are a bit bigger than females’ (like their bodies) and females’ brains stop growing earlier than males (as with their bodies). However, whatever one may believe about other organs, in the case of healthy brains, size really does NOT matter one iota. There also might be a few differences in a small part of the brain called the straight gyrus (need more testing in this one). Other than these minor aspects there are no consistent and replicated reliable differences in male and female brains; it is a human brain . . . but how we use it is another matter.

Hormones make the difference.

Everyone thinks that males and females have different hormones . . . testosterone for men and estrogen for women. Nope, all the actual hormones in males and females are the same: there are no male-only or female-only hormones. Both men and women can get a flood of testosterone when they get into a fight or take part in an exhilarating sports match. Both men and women can get a flood of oxytocin and prolactin when they pick up a newborn baby. There can be differences in the levels, patterns, and impacts of some of these hormones in male and female bodies, but individual variation is often more important than the variation between the sexes.

Keep reading for the rest.

10 Cool Facts About Olfaction

BellaSugar — Thu, 24 May 2012 03:30:00 PDT

We all have a sense of smell, and we all use it constantly, whether we realize it or not. Scents and smell are two of the most important yet often overlooked elements of everyday experience. Want to learn a few truly amazing facts about the things your nose knows? Then just keep reading.

Lil Links: Liz Lange Celebrates 10 Years at Target

Rebecca M Gruber — Tue, 22 May 2012 05:32:05 PDT

Molly Sims and Soleil Moon Frye celebrate Liz Lange's 10th anniversary at Target - Celebrity Baby Scoop
Gwyneth Paltrow's kids rock out at the Jay-Z/Kanye West concert - Celebrity Baby Blog
When motherhood is embarrassing - BabyCenter Blog
14 things to stop doing if you want to be a happy mom - The Stir
Time-tested tips for soothing crying babies - Parenting
Baby names inspired by TV shows - The Bump
Molly Sims opens up about lessons from her own mom - FitPregnancy
5 pizza toppings kids will devour - Yahoo! Shine
Tweets about life with kids that moms will love - Circle of Moms
10 money pitfalls for moms - LearnVest
What one mom misses most since having kids - HuffPost Parents
How to write a birth plan - Momtastic

How Not to Destroy Your Marriage

The Good Men Project — Fri, 18 May 2012 12:30:42 PDT

We're happy to present this story from one of our favorite sites, The Good Men Project. Today, Mark Tyrrell offers eight relationship tools to make your marriage work.

"All marriages are happy. It's the living together afterward that causes all the trouble." - Raymond Hull

So how do you make your marriage work? Or do you just blindly hope it'll take care of itself?

Think of a hot, successful date with someone you’re attracted to. You have fun, great conversation and more sexual chemistry than a warehouse full of pheromones. You don’t have to “work at” the date because it’s self sustaining. It runs as smoothly as the gliding hand of a classical guitar maestro and you can’t wait for another rendition.

Teenage Dating in a Twilight-Hunger Games World

But marriage, or any long term relationship; well that’s a whole other caboodle.

If we’re not careful, marriage can deteriorate into little more than a torturous assault course; littered with routine boredoms, frustrations and resentments. Couple all that with external pressures and sometimes marriage feels not worth the effort. But there are major benefits to being hitched or committed, other than just a beneficial tax regime.

Healthy marriage; healthy people.

Being happily married bestows heaps of health benefits. You might be forgiven for thinking that if you’re married you don’t live longer it just seems like it but, no, a good marriage really can help you clock up more years (1) and married people are happier (2) even though they don’t always look it from the outside.

But when marriage doesn’t work it can feel being manacled to a maniac, marooned with a misogynist or nailed to a nag. And I don’t care what the studies say, that’s not healthy. You may hear couples say stuff like: “We are making our marriage work!” but how do we do this?

Making it work.

We pay lip service to “working on the marriage” but what is the work we need to do? Marriage vows such as “to love and to cherish” and “forsaking all others, for better or for worse” don’t really tell us how to make it work, although they give us a clue.

Fortunately a ton of research has been done on what to do and not do to make your marriage, or any intimate relationship work. Follow the guidelines here to become “good at marriage."

Tip one: Be romantic but keep it real.

We are all (force?) fed romance in movies and novels. The handsome man gets the beautiful woman. But what I wonder is what happens after our romantic couple ride off into the sunset together? What do they do exactly? Bicker? Moan at one another? Start to ignore each other?

After all that romance, our beautiful couple is bound to have massive expectations of their life together. But when rose tinted expectations clash with day to reality, watch out!

Romance is vital in any relationship. Always seeing the best in your partner helps to keep things intimate and love should be expressed. But if you have been raised on Mills and Boon Romance novels or feel-good movies, then your own romantic expectations can work against the sustainability of your long term relationship.

When day to day life fails to live up to the giddy, heady lust-filled days of the pre-settled down romance people can become angry, even blame one another: “This wasn’t what I signed up for." They find it hard to take the rough with the smooth because they never really figured there would be any rough.

Expectations not diluted with at least a dash of realism can be a royal road to relationship ruin. Your partner may be an angel, but they have feet of clay. You must learn to love those feet or at least accept them a bit!

Get the rest after the jump!

Online Dating: 5 Ways To Stand Out From The Crowd

YourTango — Thu, 17 May 2012 12:50:50 PDT

We're happy to present this excerpt from one of our favorite sites, YourTango. Today, David Osterczy gives us an excerpt from his new book 101 Online Dating Tips.

Here is a smattering of tips from my latest book, Dating DeMistyfied, 101 Online Dating Tips.

I've left out much of "the meat and potatoes," but left in enough content for you to get an indication of what you will learn from this book. This book was written from 10 years of Internet dating experience, thousands of interviews with both men and women and research garnered from our last five to six Dating DeMistyfied Workshops.

Put great effort into writing your profile. Show passion and humor.

I mean really, if you can't have fun writing a simple online profile, then what sort of person do you suppose that you'll attract? Way back in 2001, I submitted my first profile to Match.com. I had no experience writing profiles but just figured what the hell . . . let's have fun!

I wrote the text on a Sunday night and didn't check my email until Friday night. During the five days I was "away," I received nearly 150 emails from about 120 women. Yes, some wrote me up to three times during that week! I was shocked, but realized that I was on to something!

The point that I'm attempting to make is to be sure that your personality comes through in the profile. If you're silly or funny, then by all means, portray that! If you're really smart and have a lot to say, then say it! If you're sarcastic - in a good way - then allow that to come through. If you're not into writing, like many are not, then just do the best that you can but make sure to come across as you. After all, you are the only one that you really know how to be!

Just have fun folks! Be honest and definitely ask for what you want when describing what you seek in a mate. Write in the same manner as you speak so that each person reading your profile feels that you're talking directly to him or her. After all, that is what we're all here for!

Make sure to upload only the clearest, best and most recent photos.

You'd think that this would be a no brainer, but the more you surf the personals online, the more you'll be shocked at the sheer idiocy of some people and the pictures they submit to dating sites. Photos are your first line of attack, and if they suck, no-one will even read your wonderful, well thought out profile! I'm not telling you that you need to go out and get professional shots taken, but I have friends who have done very well going exactly that route.

Simply put, if you don't have any decent, clear photos of yourself, then grab your digital (you know that you have one!) and grab some friends and spend the day taking lots of photos alone and in groups. It is critically important that you have a variety of pictures. Have some close-ups (head-shots) so that people can see how beautiful your eyes are, some full length shots so they can get an idea of your body type and some group photos so they know that you actually leave the house and can be social.

For the rest of the article, head to YourTango: Online Dating: 5 Ways To Stand Out From The Crowd

Written by David Osterczy for YourTango.

The Downsides to Meeting Your Goal Weight

Shape — Thu, 17 May 2012 04:32:50 PDT

We are pumped to share one of our fave stories from Shape here on FitSugar.

When I started losing weight, I often looked at women who were thinner than I was and thought, "Wow, her life must be so easy." I knew that once I got to my goal weight, I'd feel awesome, and healthy living would be just as easy for me as it was for all the "I can eat whatever I want and not gain weight" women around me.

11 Ways to Rev Up Your Metabolism

Now that I've lost 75 pounds, I can say that I do feel awesome . . . but I can't say that a healthy lifestyle comes easy. Weight maintenance isn't as simple as I expected. While being at my goal weight has its perks, I have to admit: I failed to appreciate some of the great benefits I enjoyed along the way. If I did it all over again, then here's what I'd do differently:

See how you can enjoy the weight-loss journey after the break!

What to Expect Author, Heidi Murkoff, Shares Women's Biggest Pregnancy Surprise

Rebecca M Gruber — Tue, 15 May 2012 10:02:05 PDT

It's hard to imagine a time when Heidi Murkoff's What to Expect When You're Expecting wasn't a staple on nightstands of expectant moms. But 28 years ago, when Murkoff was unexpectedly pregnant with her first child, she didn't know where to turn for information about how her baby was growing or what she could eat. Being an information hound, she gobbled up information and turned her research into a book that has become the go-to source for newly expectant mothers. Fast forward a few decades and her nonfiction resource is now receiving a big-screen adaptation with Cameron Diaz, Jennifer Lopez, Elizabeth Banks, Anna Kendrick, and Brooklyn Decker playing five women on the brink of parenthood. I sat down with the author to discuss the state of pregnancy today and how things have changed since she was a first-time parent.

LilSugar: It's been 28 years since the first edition of What to Expect When You're Expecting hit store shelves. Why is it still relevant today?
Heidi Murkoff: It's evolved over the years. The first edition of the first book is definitely not relevant now. First of all, she's in a rocking chair, in a potato sack, polyester pup tent! But certainly some things about pregnancy never change. It's still nine months, you're still bloating, crazy constipated, all those mood swings, etc., but a lot of things have changed. If you look at the fourth edition compared to the first edition - she's on her feet, she's smiling, she's pregnant and proud, she's happy to be pregnant. Sure, she may still be bloated and leaking and constipated, but she's celebrating her pregnancy and her body, which is something that is so different from back in the day, where we covered it up and we had to sit and wait for it to be over. We didn't embrace our pregnant selves and we definitely do now.

Keep reading to see what Murkoff says is the biggest surprise women discover about pregnancy.

Tom Cruise on His Beautiful, Creative Wife and Growing Up Without His Dad Around

Allie Merriam — Tue, 15 May 2012 09:33:00 PDT

Tom Cruise chatted with Playboy about his new movie Rock of Ages, but the conversation between the actor and interviewer Michael Fleming got quite personal. No stranger to promoting movies, Tom is happy to discuss his career and ambitions, but rarely talks about his childhood. However, in Playboy, Tom gave a great deal of insight about growing up with his mom and sisters, but not his dad. Tom also spoke about the tough career time he went through in 2005 after PR-unwise interviews on the Today show and Oprah. Tom additionally had nothing but kind words to say about his wife Katie Holmes and their family. Here are highlights:

On loving Katie: "She is an extraordinary person, and if you spent five minutes with her, you'd see it. Everything she does, she does with this beautiful creativity. When she becomes interested in something, she doesn't talk about it, she does it. One week I said to her, 'You've been up in the middle of the night. Is everything okay?' She smiled and then threw this thing on my desk and said, 'I wrote this script.' She wanted to try it, and she did. She wanted to try designing clothes, and now her line is wonderful and, to me, an example of how she just creates beautiful things in her life. She has a voice and warmth as an artist, as a mother. She's funny and charming, and when she walks into the room, I just feel better. I’m a romantic. I like doing things like creating romantic dinners, and she enjoys that. I don't know what to say - I'm just happy, and I have been since the moment I met her. What we have is very special."
On growing up without his dad around: "It wasn't a big conflict when I was growing up; that's just the way it was. I don't look back and feel bad. I know some people do, but it's not a burden I carry through life. It's more like, OK, this happened. That's how he behaved, that's how he did things. He tried, but it just was who he was. Traveling has given me a broader understanding of people, and I've always been interested in the similarities we have and why people make certain choices in life. I got an introduction to that as a young child, but it never felt like a weight I carried on my shoulders."
On how he looks so young: "I honestly have no idea. [laughs] I work. I'm always with family. I train, go without sleep. I just go hard."

To read more about what Tom says on having the same values as when he was a child, not caring about bad press, and his tough times in 2005, just read more